I Can't even believe it myself

Right now the only thing I can say is that I feel like a complete failure. I still can't believe it, but i have the paper in my hand and it reminds me that it's real. I thought extremely hard before I did it so I know that it was the best choice. I have a plan though and I will do everything I can to follow it through. There is one thing pending though that will effect what road to take. Right now I am following the plan that I think is best for this time. If I have ever said that things are different I had no clue how different things could really be. I am such a different person now. I never thought I would be in these kind of positions, but once again i know it's real and now I have to flow with it. A part of me is so scared but then the other part reminds me that God is with me and he will not let me fall and stay down. He will pick me up and give me strength to keep going. Everything is so confusing right now. I just don't understand.

Why can't people just be honest? Why do they feel the need to lie to you to "protect you"? honesty is everything......

I need to relax and just breathe. I can't stress.......