love is so crazy. you can't help but wonder if you'll ever truly find that right person. they say you have to go through so many heart breaks before you find happiness but i just don't know if i can handle it. this last relationship ruined my hope for ever finding that special someone. i just don't know anymore. i spent half my day crying after i found out the news. i mean i just don't understand. how can you say one thing and just do the opposite. i don't think i'll ever truly understand what went wrong. we felt so right. everything was perfect. he was the one and now i know i've lost him for good. i shouldn't even care because deep down inside i know i deserve better. if there is better..... maybe i should just give up. i already don't trust guys. i just can't let myself go. i've put a lock on my heart and thrown away the key. i don't want to get hurt again. that shit was too painful. i rather be alone then feel that pain. they don't lie when they feel like it's a thousand stabs in the heart. please just let me be happy. i'm so tired of hurting. so tired of feeling this pain inside. and definitely tired of crying.